Hi all!
Well, we are officially a waiting family! Our profile is done and we are featured on the website! We worked very long and hard on trying to make a short but accurate representation of who we are. Now that we are done, we suddenly have time to do things. We got our Christmas shopping done early! Everything is purchased and wrapped and ready to get packed in the car to go visit our families. I actually sent out a few Christmas card, which I have never done. I have moved on to reading a book that is not about adoption and how to be adoptive parents. I don't have to write a book report on what I have learned and how it is going to help me be a better adoptive parent. We went to our first waiting families meeting at the beginning of the month. The meeting was about a couple that have adopted 3 children through Adoption Associates! They had a lot of great advice about how they got through an adoption that fell through, how to get through some of the very uncomfortable times and how incredibly wonderful each and every adoption journey is. They made decisions as a family, they got through the hard times together and gave great inspiration to help us get through the first couple of months till our next meeting. We have met some great couples through these meetings and are glad that we have so much support around us.
Now that we are a waiting family, that is just what we are doing....waiting. Life does not stop, each day still goes on. But, it is always on my mind. We have purchased a crib and a dresser/changing table. They sit in boxes in the room that will become the baby's room. This Christmas is strange, there is really only one thing that we really want. We are looking forward to going to visit family for a few days and spending time with the kids. They really do somehow make things easier, I just wish we could spend more time with them. Everywhere we go we notice every baby and every little kid. We are more aware of every transracial family and how people interact with each other. This journey has changed many things for us. We depend on each other in more ways than we have before. I may be a little more sensitive than normal but there are a lot of emotions flying around inside me. We could be parents any day. We could get a call tomorrow or it could be months. But for today, we are waiting....impatiently! lol
Merry Chistmas!!!! Have a wonderful holiday season!!!
This is the link to our waiting families profile!
http://www.planadoption.org/waiting_families/?id=590
About Us
- Amanda and Rick
- We are currently a waiting family on our journey to becoming parents. This blog was started in hopes of keeping all our friends and family up to date on all things adoption. It has become that as well as a place for me to share our feelings and/or frustrations and a way for us to let off some steam every once in a while! Thank you all for your love and support!
Monday, December 19, 2011
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Adoption is our path to parenthood
First I want to start by giving you all a quick update on our process. We are done with our homestudy! We have finalized our photos for our profile! We are now waiting for the agency to print all the profiles, send them to us and then we have to attach our photos to the profile. We should be active adoptive parents within a few weeks!!! Very exciting!!
Now, I have a few things that I need to get off my chest. Things have been bottling up lately and then after my trip to the doctors office today I need to vent and get it all out. Today, I went to a dr. appt. Our doctor knows all about the adoption, he had to fill out our medical form for the homestudy. He walks in the room today and tells me that last month he was at the hospital reading a chart and checking on an infant. He said that he thought of us because this infant was dropped off at the fire department. He didn't contact us because he didn't want to deal with the whole thing. The child was perfectly healthy, the mother was raped by her mother's boyfriend. She left the baby and now this child needed a home, but OUR doctor couldn 't be bothered with contacting us. Are you kidding me? I just sat there, not knowing what to say. This child needed a home and instead of contacting people who want to adopt an infant, they spent the evening figuring out where this child could be placed in foster care. So after this happened this morning, everything that people say to me lately that they think is helpful really started to tick me off. So, here are a few things that adoptive parents don't want to hear.... We are unable to have children ourselves, adoption was not our way to relax so that we could get pregnant. We WANT to adopt. We want people to be supportive and happy for us about the way we are choosing to be parents. We do not want to hear, "Now you will get pregnant, cause you will be more relaxed" Also, it is not helpful when people decide to talk to us about adoptions that have fallen through and not happened. That is not helpful or encouraging information.
I also know that there a lot of people out there that are very supportive and happy about how we are going to become parents. But, when I am having a bad day or need a little uplifting, please stop telling me that we will get there. I know we will get there, sometimes I just need to say how much this waiting sucks. And somtimes we need to bitch and complain and freak out about how much this is going to cost. We didn't anticipate this and we don't have the thousands of dollars needed stashed away somewhere.
And finally, we may be adopting but we are still real parents! If I want to take up to 12 weeks of maternity leave, I can and I have every right to. As adoptive parents, we deserve to experience every moment of expecting a child. We bought a crib, we will paint the room, we will register, we will have a baby shower, we will talk about it and we will want you to be excited about us expecting as well. We very well may be a transracial family somday and we are excited and proud of that. Anyone that thinks anything otherwise should really keep their mouth shut. We know that we are going to continue to face these challenges as we become a family, but I felt that I needed to get some of it off my chest. We are so very happy about our adotpion process and can't wait to see what God has planned for us!
Now, I have a few things that I need to get off my chest. Things have been bottling up lately and then after my trip to the doctors office today I need to vent and get it all out. Today, I went to a dr. appt. Our doctor knows all about the adoption, he had to fill out our medical form for the homestudy. He walks in the room today and tells me that last month he was at the hospital reading a chart and checking on an infant. He said that he thought of us because this infant was dropped off at the fire department. He didn't contact us because he didn't want to deal with the whole thing. The child was perfectly healthy, the mother was raped by her mother's boyfriend. She left the baby and now this child needed a home, but OUR doctor couldn 't be bothered with contacting us. Are you kidding me? I just sat there, not knowing what to say. This child needed a home and instead of contacting people who want to adopt an infant, they spent the evening figuring out where this child could be placed in foster care. So after this happened this morning, everything that people say to me lately that they think is helpful really started to tick me off. So, here are a few things that adoptive parents don't want to hear.... We are unable to have children ourselves, adoption was not our way to relax so that we could get pregnant. We WANT to adopt. We want people to be supportive and happy for us about the way we are choosing to be parents. We do not want to hear, "Now you will get pregnant, cause you will be more relaxed" Also, it is not helpful when people decide to talk to us about adoptions that have fallen through and not happened. That is not helpful or encouraging information.
I also know that there a lot of people out there that are very supportive and happy about how we are going to become parents. But, when I am having a bad day or need a little uplifting, please stop telling me that we will get there. I know we will get there, sometimes I just need to say how much this waiting sucks. And somtimes we need to bitch and complain and freak out about how much this is going to cost. We didn't anticipate this and we don't have the thousands of dollars needed stashed away somewhere.
And finally, we may be adopting but we are still real parents! If I want to take up to 12 weeks of maternity leave, I can and I have every right to. As adoptive parents, we deserve to experience every moment of expecting a child. We bought a crib, we will paint the room, we will register, we will have a baby shower, we will talk about it and we will want you to be excited about us expecting as well. We very well may be a transracial family somday and we are excited and proud of that. Anyone that thinks anything otherwise should really keep their mouth shut. We know that we are going to continue to face these challenges as we become a family, but I felt that I needed to get some of it off my chest. We are so very happy about our adotpion process and can't wait to see what God has planned for us!
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Working on the Profile
We are finally done with all of our training requirements! We have read our books and articles. We have watched videos online. We have written our paragraphs for each section of training. We are done!!!!! Our caseworker told us on Sunday that she has finished our homestudy paperwork and typed her report. The homestudy is DONE!!!!!!! Now we just have to finish our profile and we will be active waiting adoptive parents! We are so very very happy to have this part completed. It was consuming us. We would work and read and work and read..... We are now going to finish getting pictures together for our profile and take some time to relax.
Our only sadness is that our amazing caseworker that made us feel so at ease is leaving the agency. We have enjoyed working with her so much. She really understood us and our personalities. We hope that our next caseworker will be equally as amazing. There is still so much to do, we wish that she was going to be there to guide us through. Things have been so great so far, I just hope that they will continue to go as smoothly as they have. Changing caseworkers right now makes me nervous.
I will be back to soon to let you know how things are going with our profile! Keep us in your prayers! And we thank you all for your continued support!
Our only sadness is that our amazing caseworker that made us feel so at ease is leaving the agency. We have enjoyed working with her so much. She really understood us and our personalities. We hope that our next caseworker will be equally as amazing. There is still so much to do, we wish that she was going to be there to guide us through. Things have been so great so far, I just hope that they will continue to go as smoothly as they have. Changing caseworkers right now makes me nervous.
I will be back to soon to let you know how things are going with our profile! Keep us in your prayers! And we thank you all for your continued support!
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Almost there!!!!!
Hi all! We have been crazy busy getting everything done for our homestudy. We have been reading and working on our training requirements. We have been gathering photos and trying to get ready for our final visit. We just attended our transracial/transcultural meeting on Monday. It was very informative and very helpful in our desicion to be open to building a transracial family! We are very excited to have our final home visit this coming Monday! So, we will be busy getting our house ready for the social workers visit! We will then be focused on finishing our educatuion requirements and getting all of our profile completed! This journey has really taught us a lot about ourselves and the people around us! We knew we were a strong couple with wonderful family and friends, but this process has certainly drilled that home for us. We are so anxious to bring home our child. We know that it will continue to challenge our patience but we believe that God will bring our family together.
I know that sometimes my posts are far apart, but I promise we will keep you all updated on what is happening in our journey. Thank you for following our blog, thank you for all of your support!
I know that sometimes my posts are far apart, but I promise we will keep you all updated on what is happening in our journey. Thank you for following our blog, thank you for all of your support!
Monday, September 26, 2011
Here we go....Beginning our Home Study
It is so crazy because I feel like we have been on this journey for such a long time already and we have barely started. We had our first required meeting for the home study on Sept. 12th. It was a 3 hour meeting that walked us through the entire process. It was a group meeting so there were about 6 other couples at this meeting. We went home with so much information. We came home with a 3 ring binder filled with information to take us through every step of the way! This week, we will have our first meeting with our caseworker! We are extremely excited for this step. It makes it feel like we are finally getting somewhere! Everyday feels like a week and every week feels like a month. It is insane how slow time can feel sometimes.
We have been keeping busy with work and getting all our information together for the homestudy. Recent events have helped give us a jump start, created excitement and tested us. But, we have remained focused on what needs to be done. We have remained grounded and continue to trust that what is suppose to be, will be. God knows where and when our baby will arrive and we have to continue to remember that even when it gets tough. It also helps that we are always here for each other and we have amazing family and friends that have jumped to our side to help us with whatever seems to happen!
We need to get working on our profile, so we are gonna set up a few photo sessions with a friend of ours! We also have to start working on all the info that will be written in our profile! The profile seems to be the scariest part. We don't want to screw it up, this may be what helps us get chosen. Of course the caseworker will help us with what we write but I just want to be 100% sure that it gets across how much love we have to offer a baby! They have also given us many suggestions on how to market ourselves and find our own birthmother. So, we will definitely be working on those things as well. We have so many family and friends that can keep an ear open and maybe someone will know someone that knows someone and so on. The more contacts we make with a birthmother the better! We certainly have enough to keep us busy, but at the same time we need to take time to relax. If we go go go without a break, we will go crazy! It is hard for me, I feel like there is always something to do and I can't let it sit. This seems to be the one time that I am not procrastinating. Who would have thought...
Rick set up the garage sale again and made a little more money for the adoption fund! We still have plenty of stuff to try to sell, so we will probably set up once or twice more. So....thank you again to everyone that had donated items to the garage sale.
I will continue to keep you all posted!!!!
We have been keeping busy with work and getting all our information together for the homestudy. Recent events have helped give us a jump start, created excitement and tested us. But, we have remained focused on what needs to be done. We have remained grounded and continue to trust that what is suppose to be, will be. God knows where and when our baby will arrive and we have to continue to remember that even when it gets tough. It also helps that we are always here for each other and we have amazing family and friends that have jumped to our side to help us with whatever seems to happen!
We need to get working on our profile, so we are gonna set up a few photo sessions with a friend of ours! We also have to start working on all the info that will be written in our profile! The profile seems to be the scariest part. We don't want to screw it up, this may be what helps us get chosen. Of course the caseworker will help us with what we write but I just want to be 100% sure that it gets across how much love we have to offer a baby! They have also given us many suggestions on how to market ourselves and find our own birthmother. So, we will definitely be working on those things as well. We have so many family and friends that can keep an ear open and maybe someone will know someone that knows someone and so on. The more contacts we make with a birthmother the better! We certainly have enough to keep us busy, but at the same time we need to take time to relax. If we go go go without a break, we will go crazy! It is hard for me, I feel like there is always something to do and I can't let it sit. This seems to be the one time that I am not procrastinating. Who would have thought...
Rick set up the garage sale again and made a little more money for the adoption fund! We still have plenty of stuff to try to sell, so we will probably set up once or twice more. So....thank you again to everyone that had donated items to the garage sale.
I will continue to keep you all posted!!!!
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Application, Home Study, Homework
I have been absent from our blog for awhile, but I am back! Everything is about to get rolling! Some of you are probably wondering how our garage sale went. We survived and we are here to say, IT WAS A HUGE SUCCESS!!!!!!!!!! We worked hard and had lots of help from family and friends! We did get rained out on Saturday, but we bounced back with a very busy day on Sunday! Thank you so much to everyone that made donations and helped out at the sale! We appreciate your support more than you know. We do still have a garage full of stuff so we may do a couple one day sales over the next few months. Now that the garage sale is over, it has been pretty mellow around here. Not much happening for the adoption for about 3 more weeks. It gets pretty hard, the waiting. But, I have been trying to gather some of the books and articles that we need to read as part of our home study. That is right, we have homework for our adoption! Which will probably only help us through the process, and keep me busy so that the waiting doesn't get the best of me. Our home study will probably take about 6-10 weeks. The first step of the home study is a meeting on Sept. 12th. This meeting is going to talk about the home study process while really focusing on the profile that we will need to complete. We will have to gather pictures and do a little writing about ourselves and our families. The meeting will help us to know what kinds of pictures and information is needed to create a great profile. This profile is what will introduce us to birth parents as potential adoptive parents! So, you can imagine how important our profile will be! At this meeting we will also be able to meet other adoptive parents, which will be great! We will be able to have contacts that are going through the same process. After this meeting we will than have our first meeting with our social worker and begin the actual home study!
For now, we have our formal application to complete and send into the adoption agency. We also have lots of reading to do, and we need to get to work on finding pictures of us that we can use in our profile. All of this and work should hopefully keep us busy so that the waiting parts don't get too unbearable. Some days are of course harder than others, but hopefully I have enough to do right now to stay focused!
For now, we have our formal application to complete and send into the adoption agency. We also have lots of reading to do, and we need to get to work on finding pictures of us that we can use in our profile. All of this and work should hopefully keep us busy so that the waiting parts don't get too unbearable. Some days are of course harder than others, but hopefully I have enough to do right now to stay focused!
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
GARAGE SALE!!!!!!!!!!
The garage sale begins in a few days! You would not believe how much stuff has been donated! I can't wait to see what it looks like when it is all set up. Today, a friend at work pointed out that I have not given out our address so that you can actually find this massive garage sale! So, here it is...
Our house is back in a subdivision by 11 Mile and Ryan.
27468 Thomas Ave.
Warren, MI 48092
Tonight we cleaned up the yard and the house. We are ready for all our weekend guests! Both of our moms are coming to stay with us for the weekend to help out with the sale. A few of our friends will be coming to help our as well. Tomorrow night my amazing new friends/co-workers are coming to our house to help us get everything organized. Our garage is so full that it is definitely not just a two person job! If any other friends and family want to stop by tomorrow night for our sale organizing party, all are welcome!!! Plus you can get first pick on garage sale items!!!
After we get a chance to go through the boxes we will try to give you all an update about what items we are going to have here. Also, my mom has been making these adorable hats for kids. She is going to get them finished and then we will have pictures up! She will be selling them to help with our adoption fund as well.
I know that I have said this a few times already, but I am going to say it again. We have been so blessed by awesome friends and family that have donated not only items to our garage sale but also money to our adoption fund. I hope you all know how truely grateful we are and how much each of you mean to us. We have only just really begun this process and the support is amazing. We can't wait to share our journey with you!
Our house is back in a subdivision by 11 Mile and Ryan.
27468 Thomas Ave.
Warren, MI 48092
Tonight we cleaned up the yard and the house. We are ready for all our weekend guests! Both of our moms are coming to stay with us for the weekend to help out with the sale. A few of our friends will be coming to help our as well. Tomorrow night my amazing new friends/co-workers are coming to our house to help us get everything organized. Our garage is so full that it is definitely not just a two person job! If any other friends and family want to stop by tomorrow night for our sale organizing party, all are welcome!!! Plus you can get first pick on garage sale items!!!
After we get a chance to go through the boxes we will try to give you all an update about what items we are going to have here. Also, my mom has been making these adorable hats for kids. She is going to get them finished and then we will have pictures up! She will be selling them to help with our adoption fund as well.
I know that I have said this a few times already, but I am going to say it again. We have been so blessed by awesome friends and family that have donated not only items to our garage sale but also money to our adoption fund. I hope you all know how truely grateful we are and how much each of you mean to us. We have only just really begun this process and the support is amazing. We can't wait to share our journey with you!
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
We chose our adoption agency!
We finally had our meeting with Adoption Associates yesterday!! It went great! She was very helpful and straight forward with everything. She answered all our questions honestly and didn't make us feel like she was hiding anything. The meeting really put us at ease that they are going to take very good care of us, but at the same time raised our awareness of some situations that could arise. She gave us a lot of information about how adoption has evolved over the last 30 or so years. We have an opportunity to really market ourselves and make sure that everyone knows our situation and that we are looking to adopt a baby! You never know who might know somebody, who knows somebody who wants to create an adoption plan for her baby. The agency will really help give us some direction on how to really market ourselves and possibly find our own birthmother. This is where all our work comes in, this is where we can hopefully help our process move quicker.
We of course had to talk about the tough subject of all the fees that go along with adoption. This of course is not our favorite topic. Domestic infant adoption can cost $21,000-$28,000. It really is crazy to me that this is what we have to pay to become parents. But, if that is what it takes to bring our son or daughter home, than that is what we are going to do.
Now that we have finished this meeting, we need to complete our formal application and gather up our funds. There is one more meeting that we need to attend before we begin our home study. The next meeting is Sept.12th. We will need to send in our formal application with the initial fees before this meeting. The meeting will focus on the homestudy and what will happen during this process. After our meeting on Sept.12th we will then schedule our first meeting with our social worker and our homestudy will begin!!!!!!! The home study will take 6-10 weeks and then we will be officially approved to be adoptive parents!!!! We will of course keep everyone updated as we go through this process. Please keep us in your prayers as we continue our journey.
The garage sale is coming up in a few weeks! We have so many donations for the garage sale, it is going to be huge! We will update you on how things are going and the results of our sale! Make sure if you stop by and check it out! Let everyone you know, know about our huge adoption garage sale! We have lots of great things to sell!!!!!
We of course had to talk about the tough subject of all the fees that go along with adoption. This of course is not our favorite topic. Domestic infant adoption can cost $21,000-$28,000. It really is crazy to me that this is what we have to pay to become parents. But, if that is what it takes to bring our son or daughter home, than that is what we are going to do.
Now that we have finished this meeting, we need to complete our formal application and gather up our funds. There is one more meeting that we need to attend before we begin our home study. The next meeting is Sept.12th. We will need to send in our formal application with the initial fees before this meeting. The meeting will focus on the homestudy and what will happen during this process. After our meeting on Sept.12th we will then schedule our first meeting with our social worker and our homestudy will begin!!!!!!! The home study will take 6-10 weeks and then we will be officially approved to be adoptive parents!!!! We will of course keep everyone updated as we go through this process. Please keep us in your prayers as we continue our journey.
The garage sale is coming up in a few weeks! We have so many donations for the garage sale, it is going to be huge! We will update you on how things are going and the results of our sale! Make sure if you stop by and check it out! Let everyone you know, know about our huge adoption garage sale! We have lots of great things to sell!!!!!
Friday, July 8, 2011
Adoption Application!!
Today, we sent in our prelminary application to the adoption agency! We have our initial consultation with an agency that we are interested in on Monday July 18th!! We are so excited to have taken this step!
We also recieved our garage sale permit in the mail today,so it is official!! We are so thankful for all of the support from family and friends! This is going to be quit the garage sale so let your friends and family know!!!!!
We also recieved our garage sale permit in the mail today,so it is official!! We are so thankful for all of the support from family and friends! This is going to be quit the garage sale so let your friends and family know!!!!!
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Adoption garage sale!!!!!
We have finally decided on the dates for our garage sale to help with our adoption expenses. The garage sale will be Friday August 5th to Sunday August 7th. It should be quit the garage sale. Between Rick and I we have enough Express clothes to fill a couple closets as well as tons of other great stuff.
We have had so many people donate items to us to sell in the sale. We have felt so much support from the people that have donated as well as everyone that has been passing on our story. I hope that you all know how much you touch my heart. It is such an amazing feeling, to feel the support of having everyone in your corner. Thank you!
Today at work, I was helping a patient that was picking up her glasses. I was telling her about how Rick and I are about to start our adoption journey. She began to tell me about her struggles with trying to have a baby. Her and her husband have been married for 63 years. They never had any children. She held my hand and said she would say a prayer. I told her about my blog and about the "chip in" button. I told her that I told my friends that all we need is 5000 people to donate $1 and we would have a great start to what we need for this adoption. After I adjusted her glasses she handed me $1 and said "Here go sweetie, here's my $1" I was so touched by this woman. She was so sweet. I started to tear up, my co-worker started to tear up and then my customer started to tear up. She told me that I had to promise to let her know what is going on. I told her that of course I will!
I am just so overwhelmed by the support that we are already recieving, it is amazing!
We have had so many people donate items to us to sell in the sale. We have felt so much support from the people that have donated as well as everyone that has been passing on our story. I hope that you all know how much you touch my heart. It is such an amazing feeling, to feel the support of having everyone in your corner. Thank you!
Today at work, I was helping a patient that was picking up her glasses. I was telling her about how Rick and I are about to start our adoption journey. She began to tell me about her struggles with trying to have a baby. Her and her husband have been married for 63 years. They never had any children. She held my hand and said she would say a prayer. I told her about my blog and about the "chip in" button. I told her that I told my friends that all we need is 5000 people to donate $1 and we would have a great start to what we need for this adoption. After I adjusted her glasses she handed me $1 and said "Here go sweetie, here's my $1" I was so touched by this woman. She was so sweet. I started to tear up, my co-worker started to tear up and then my customer started to tear up. She told me that I had to promise to let her know what is going on. I told her that of course I will!
I am just so overwhelmed by the support that we are already recieving, it is amazing!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
My first post! Our first steps to adoption.
Hello everyone!!!! So, I wanted to create this blog so that I could talk about everything that we go through as we take our journey through the adoption process. I wanted a way to be able to keep family and friends involved in what happens. I am not a writer so I apologize if my thoughts are hard to follow. I will try to keep myself organized!
Rick and I have been to several adoption agencies to talk to them and ask questions. We have done plenty of research online as well as talk to several couples that we know that have been through the process. We have one more agency that we will be meeting with in a few weeks. Once we have met with them we will be able to make a decision about which agency we want to work with. After that we will hopefully begin our home study!!! This will be a long but exciting process as we create a profile and do networking of our own to make sure everyone knows that we want to adopt a baby! Your thoughts, prayers and support are greatly appreciated as we navigate our way through this process!
I also created a link for people to "chip in" and help us jump start our process. We have had many discussions recently around the idea of fundraisers to help with the cost of adoption. We are not really into the idea of a big fundraiser, but we do acknowledge that we could use a little help. With that being said, we are working on a date for a garage sale! We are thinking of a weekend in August. Between the two of us we have enough stuff tucked away in this house to get us started! If any of you have anything you would like to donate to our garage sale to help us out we would really appreciate it! As soon as we decide on the dates for the garage sale, I will let you know!!
Rick and I have been to several adoption agencies to talk to them and ask questions. We have done plenty of research online as well as talk to several couples that we know that have been through the process. We have one more agency that we will be meeting with in a few weeks. Once we have met with them we will be able to make a decision about which agency we want to work with. After that we will hopefully begin our home study!!! This will be a long but exciting process as we create a profile and do networking of our own to make sure everyone knows that we want to adopt a baby! Your thoughts, prayers and support are greatly appreciated as we navigate our way through this process!
I also created a link for people to "chip in" and help us jump start our process. We have had many discussions recently around the idea of fundraisers to help with the cost of adoption. We are not really into the idea of a big fundraiser, but we do acknowledge that we could use a little help. With that being said, we are working on a date for a garage sale! We are thinking of a weekend in August. Between the two of us we have enough stuff tucked away in this house to get us started! If any of you have anything you would like to donate to our garage sale to help us out we would really appreciate it! As soon as we decide on the dates for the garage sale, I will let you know!!
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